Monthly Archives: November 2010

the pie that didn’t want to be born

Like an idiot, I volunteered to bring a banana cream pie to Thanksgiving dinner tomorrow. Of all the desserts in my admittedly basic repertoire, the cream pies are the biggest pains in the ass, and this evening’s stayed true to form.

Things I learned over the three+ hours of wrestling with this fucker:

  1. If one ever happens upon a quick, easy recipe for butter pie crust, one should bookmark it so as to prevent having to settle for an inferior, ass-pain of a recipe next time one plans to make one.
  2. If one is looking for a novel upper-body workout, rolling the dough from one of these inferior recipes is surprisingly effective.
  3. If strange little brown flakes start appearing in your boiling vat of pie filling, it’s probably because it’s carmelizing at the bottom of the pan.
  4. It’s not a banana cream pie if you forget to add the bananas!
  5. Don’t walk away from your baking timer until you’ve checked to make sure it’s actually working.

But in the end, it’s all worth it, ’cause look how pretty it is!

"I'm a pretty, pretty pie," said in Teen Girl Squad voice.

 

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There Will Be Mario Sound Effects

Via CreepyGirl, one of my favorite blip.fm DJs, here’s all of There Will Be Blood’s melodramatic glory rolled up into a 60 second video game clip.

“Milkshakes!”